the first days v.s the last day－Super Super

Hi, it is the 1st day of Rat - 2008..to be precisely....it is 2nd day...I went to a temple today...feel good. it is always nice to be in the peaceful environment, especially this kind of messy era. Not only "First", it is something that I feel like just need to say something here~a new thing to me. Welcome to the real world. I am still like a kid, wondering and dreaming that there is some paradise and people are nice and nice.!@#$%^&*~~~

Well, actually, I wanna say it is also some "Last Day" to me. it sounds funny, but maybe the so-called "Last Day" has been few days ago which I don't get realized. Shame on me. I am used to be an optimistic girl, and always give support to all my friends. However, these days, I am NOT!! I don't know why but can feel the change on me, which is unreasonable and almost lose myself and even hate myself a lot. It is really weird. I don't even know myself. just like depression....mm...I can say everything is all gone. At least I have tried my best. I know I still need some days to fill up to FULL.

There are lots of challenges coming this year, I am still considering how I can deal with those and how to maximize the benefit. Dad told me that he believes I can do whatever I can, he supports me on my decision which is so touched. I am looking for a stable relationship who loves me and I love too, but it is not that easy.

No matter family, relationship, working, the shit is just happening everyday which is something I need to get realized and understand and always prepare to fight for those and provide total solution. Now, I am still far behind.... Wake up, dear...it is already 2008, stand up!!!!!!!!!! Trust Yourself~ Sun